posted 20th November 2025
"Finding Astrology"
When I first stepped into astrology in a truly serious way, I was at a point in my life where I felt completely and utterly lost. I had so many skills, qualifications, and experiences—events, customer service, teaching, writing, journalism, presenting, acting, singing, dancing, modelling. On paper, everything looked good: a job I enjoyed, a comfortable salary, a safe and beautiful place to live, good friends… but inside, I felt profoundly empty. Every night I was sinking into quiet despair. And on top of the emotional weight, I was living with chronic daily pain that no therapist, doctor, consultant, spiritual guide, or medical practitioner could explain. I was dismissed, doubted, and told to “just live with it.” Every opinion contradicted the next, and still I knew deep down that none of it was the real answer.
Eventually, I turned inward. I made the choice to focus on my own healing without distractions—and that’s what led me to Bali for three months, where I completed two intensive yoga teacher trainings including meditation, breath work and energetic cleansing.
Bali is a spiritual passageway, and not a place for the faint-hearted. The veil is thin, as if the space between this world and the next softens, offering us the chance to clear karma at its root and face our shadows head-on. I think a part of me already knew this—I had been to Bali once before, in 2015, and I’m not someone who usually returns to the same place twice. But this time, I felt a strong pull to come back and do this particular training, even though I had already paid for a 200-hour YTT in India.
In the end, I followed that instinct. I redirected myself to Bali—and India came four years later.
From Emptiness To Purpose
When I completed the training and left Bali in November 2018, I felt a level of euphoria I had never experienced before. It was a deep inner peace—something I never thought was possible, and something my logical mind simply couldn’t understand.
But when I returned to my “real life,” nothing made sense anymore. Everything I had spent the last eight years building—my work in events, presenting, scriptwriting, castings, auditions—suddenly felt empty. Agents were calling me constantly, offering opportunities I had once dreamed of, and yet in that moment… it all felt meaningless.
When I came back to the UK after that, I began reading and learning more about purpose—something I never imagined I struggled with. But something inside me had shifted. I no longer had any drive to push, perform, or achieve. All I wanted was to enjoy life and rebuild my health. In hindsight, that was probably the whole point: with so many distractions before, how could I ever slow down enough to understand what was truly happening inside me?
Jumping ahead a few years—because I want to focus more on the astrology side for you—I already knew my birth chart. I had read my Café Astrology report over and over again. But something always felt “off.” Parts of it didn’t feel like me at all.
Eventually, I discovered why. For years, my mum had given me the wrong birth time. When I finally found the original record with my exact time of birth, the chart suddenly made sense. This is why your exact birth time is so important! Even just 1 minute can make a HUGE difference.
When I finally trained with my teacher, the experience was profound. It helped me understand why I had so many diverse skills, why my life had reached such a major turning point, and—most importantly—it introduced me to the power of the Rahu–Ketu axis .
Most online astrology applications don’t even show or explain this point to you, at least not in detail, yet to me it is the most important part of astrology. Where you have come from, and where you are going.
Who are Rahu & Ketu?
So, let me give you a very simple overview of Rahu and Ketu without complicating things.
Rahuis known as the head of the dragon. It represents the North Node—the furthest point away from the Moon in the northern direction.
Ketuis the tail of the dragon. It represents the South Node, the southern point furthest away from the Moon.
In astrology, the Moon governs your emotional world—how you feel, how you respond, and the way you need to be nurtured. Rahu and Ketu sit on the opposite polarity of that emotional landscape.
The way I like to describe them is this:
Ketu is the energy you bring in from previous lifetimes—your skills, your talents, your natural abilities, and the inner wisdom your soul has already developed. It’s familiar. It feels comfortable. It’s territory you’ve already mastered.
Rahu, on the other hand, is the complete opposite. As both my teacher and Ernst Wilhelm like to say, Rahu is the jungle.
It’s the place in life you don’t understand at first—where you have no experience, no logical framework, and no emotional reference point. It feels foreign, unfamiliar, and extremely uncomfortable in general.
And yet, Rahu is exactly what you’re meant to learn in this lifetime.It’s the path of growth. It’s the energy you are here to integrate with the wisdom you already carry from your previous life—your Ketu.
Of course, if you’re reading this, you’re likely already a spiritually attuned and conscious person. But if you’re not, some of this may feel challenging to grasp. Yes, the choices we make in life shape the outcomes we experience. But there is also a deeper understanding found in astrology and many other spiritual systems.
For example, in India there are the ancient Nadi leaves—writings on leaves said to contain a person’s entire destiny, including names, dates and life events. People travel there in search of the leaf said to be theirs. Whether you believe in such things or not, there is a shared idea across many traditions that our soul arrives with a story already in motion.
The way I see it—and the way I want to share astrology with you—is that your soul is here to evolve. That is its purpose. The more it evolves, the more peace, joy, clarity, and understanding we experience. And collectively, this contributes to a more harmonious world.
We are not separate from our environment. Even if we call ourselves independent, we do not exist independently: without water, nature, oxygen, sleep, nourishment and the Earth itself, we simply wouldn’t survive. Everything works in tandem. Clean water, clean food, clean environments create cleaner energy within us which, in turn, supports a healthier collective. So when people say their daily choices don’t matter, I completely disagree—they matter deeply, not only for your astrology chart, but for the world.
Your astrology chart shows your current point of evolution—what you’ve already mastered and where your soul has already grown—and it also shows where you need to do the work. Some people enter this lifetime thinking they have everything figured out, moving forward with purpose, structure, and confidence… until they hit a major block, like I did.
Often, everything we build is influenced by conditioning, by what others told us we “should” do, or by what feels secure or acceptable. We spend so much of our lives in our comfort zone, and when life challenges us, we assume we’ve gone the wrong way instead of recognising it as an invitation to grow.
This is why astrology is so helpful. It clearly reveals your natural gifts, talents, and strengths—things you didn’t have to learn, because they’re already part of you. It also shows your weaker areas, not in a negative way, but in a way that highlights where your growth lies. Some people are naturally incredible negotiators, some are deeply empathetic, some thrive in large groups while others find them overwhelming. If we refuse new experiences, we block our own evolution. And what we resist will return again and again—sometimes in the form of similar people or situations.
For example, if someone repeatedly encounters narcissistic or emotionally detached partners, it’s often a sign that they haven’t yet mastered their boundaries. Empathetic people are especially drawn into these dynamics because they see the other person’s wound and feel responsible for helping them. But until we recognise the pattern and heal it, it will intensify—louder, darker, more confronting—until we finally make a change.
When we don’t confront these lessons, they begin to manifest internally: illness, tension, frustration, anger turned inward. And anger itself isn’t bad—it shows us where our boundaries lie, what we value, and where a line has been crossed. If unexpressed, it becomes headaches, high blood pressure, a disregulated nervous system.
Blending Into The New You
This is why I love the Rahu and Ketu axis so much. Beyond showing how you communicate, what you desire, and how you connect with others, Rahu and Ketu reveal exactly where you need to rise. It’s not about abandoning who you are—it’s about integrating who you’ve always been (Ketu) with who you’re here to become (Rahu).
When you merge your natural talents, strengths, and innate wisdom with the parts of yourself you’re here to develop, the transformation is profound—not just for you, but for everyone around you.
For example, someone who is naturally comfortable in relationships, even leaning towards co-dependency, may struggle to stand independently in their own light. But when they learn to balance both—maintaining empowerment, individuality, and connection—they thrive. They no longer lose themselves in others. They shine as themselves within relationships, rather than dissolving into them.
This union of Ketu and Rahu—your past mastery and your present evolution—is what shapes the powerful, whole, integrated soul you are here to become.
So with all that being said do you know where your Rahu and Ketu are seated?
- Are you tuned enough to know wear your absolutely comfortable and where you're absolutely not?
- Do you know the difference between what you've been conditioned into what is coming naturally from you and what other things you need to work on?
- Are you brave enough to step forward and initiate the change within you which also initiates change with those around you?
Without overwhelming you, I want to share something important: you don’t have to find every answer on your own. And yet—if I’m completely honest—most of what I’ve learned in my life has come through my own searching.
But, when I look at my own personal astrology chart, I finally understand why certain things that never happen to others, happen to me.
For instance, most people go to the doctor once, twice, maybe three times and receive a diagnosis. For me, that has never been the case. Every time I reached out for help for anything—whether medical, emotional, or spiritual—it somehow led me to a dead end. Confusing, frustrating, and often painful.
But understanding my Rahu–Ketu axis changed everything. It showed me that I came into this lifetime with a huge amount of soul wisdom—skills, abilities, intuition, knowing—that I had already developed before. My path wasn’t about finding someone else to give me the answers. It was about spending time with myself, digging those gifts out from the roots of my own being and sharing it with you guys.
Instead of moulding myself to other people’s expectations—or slipping into the chameleon-like tendencies I naturally have—I had to learn to trust myself much more deeply than most. To listen to my own inner wisdom. To stay connected to my true, authentic self rather than shape-shifting into what others wanted or needed from me.And through that process, I realised something powerful: I am genuinely blessed. My soul has done a lot of work before this lifetime. And the more I honour that, the more aligned, grounded and purposeful my life becomes.
And of course, if part of you wonder whether I’m being a bit full of myself for sharing these things, that’s perfectly okay. I understand. But truly, everything I’ve expressed comes from a grounded connection to ME — not from anyone else’s projections or expectations. This is simply the path my soul is evolving through, in this lifetime.
But what about YOU… I would truly love to understand what your path looks like and share it with you.
If you feel called to explore your own journey, your soul lessons, and the wisdom written into your chart, let’s book in a reading and discover it together.
Much love, Crystal X
